Monday, June 1, 2015

Tinder and the Loss of Self Esteem. " Warning this post comes with adult content only suitable for those over 18 years of age."

Warning Adult Content

As a follow up to my Tinder investigative report, I have been getting emails questioning why this dating application can in anyway be associated with bullying or cyberbullying. As stated earlier the application is used to find a love connection by swiping right for like and left for dislike.  Studies have shown women use the site for self validation.  By posting pictures women set themselves up for rejection from a variety of men. Let's say a woman sifts through male profiles, clicks on like and subsequent to that like swipe the woman never receives a match.  A woman may take this as a rejection.  The rejection as studies have shown are mainly based on the women's appearance.  Profiles are rarely read so it is conceivable that the rejection was more based on the physicality of a woman's appearance.  Even though the rejection is truly not bullying, the issue of self esteem plays a big role in the outcome of bullying instances.  Many state laws specifically state that in order for someone to experience bullying they must have endured either physical harm or emotional and psychological harm.  Even though the male does not intend to hurt the female by swiping left, the rejection can cause the female to suffer great emotional hurt due to lowering of her self esteem. Having low self esteem can be harmful to the person and in turn cause trouble in both social and work aspects of the person's life.  Men also get rejected too.  Articles posted on the Internet, written by men and regarding their experience on Tinder have shown that men are just as capable of low self esteem issues from rejection.

The other aspect is, if there is match. For example if there is a match and one party engages in conversation with no response from the responding party that rejection can also cause self doubt while withering away their self esteem.  Or let's say there is a response and conversation engages, the other party may be abusive or condescending. These factors can create emotional hurt and cause current emotional problems to escalate. 

Our world has changed due to social media.  While it is a great way to connect with others the downfall is so many people get caught up in the game for acceptance and appreciation. Many base their self worth on how many likes they get on a facebook posts or how many matches they get on Tinder. Education is the key.  I believe these application should come with disclaimers or at least a warning for both the participants and depending on the age of the participant, their parent or guardian.  I believe more studies need to be done regarding these applications and the harm they can cause participants.  Although as we know with cigarettes and alcohol, it took many years of mental health issues as well as severe physical disease before warnings were posted on the packaging of these products. There really is no regulation on the Internet.  People can post anything, they can be mean and cruel and all by doing it anonymously. I hope with my investigative reports regarding the various applications, I can educate the public and the world of social media can be a better place.

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